Me-Time: How To Treat Yourself like Someone you Love?

‘You got to treat yourself like someone you love!’

‘I am just so freakin’ tired. I need me-time.’

‘That was so exhausting, Me-time ASAP!’

‘I just never get me-time, never!’

I am sure you have heard these sentences, together or in fragments, like a billion times. Be it from yourself or from others, you have heard these in many forms and dialects. So have I. But one thing I never fully understood was; what is me-time? I spend time alone very often, since I am a homebody, I mostly sleep, read, or watch movies. Will that be considered me-time? Since it’s all by me, duh! I wasn’t really sure of it; all I knew was I am supposed to make myself feel ‘relaxed’, like really relaxed, almost Zen to this cruel world. And what’s a better place to look for ‘how to have a proper me-time’ other than Google? Well, inside scoop, I later realized it implies treating yourself like someone you love.

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A little Story-time for Me-Time!

I came across a YouTube video by this internet celebrity whom I admire. It was titled ‘My Me-Time routine’. I was agog. Finally, someone to tell me what exactly I am supposed to be doing! That too, someone I look up to. It was a 25-minute long video; which was enough for me to click off, but I was desperate to find ‘the secret’ that I spared those 25 minutes of my life which I am never going to get back (Not really though, I love and still watch her).

The video was very, thorough. She had this whole day, yes, one whole day, to unwind and enjoy her own company. Well, she always models, works out, and uploads every single day, so I guess she deserves it. In this whole day, she walked and played with her pet dog, watered her garden, cooked these exotic dishes, went shopping, had her hair and nails done, and had this whole shower/hair care/skincare routine which consumed 13 minutes of that 25-minute video, with candles inside the bathroom! I have never understood that concept, nor will I ever I think, it is straight-up dangerous to me (not criticizing those who do love lighting candles in the bath; by all means do what makes you comfortable, just my POV).

After that video I was exuberant, this is what I will do exactly. But only, I don’t own a pet dog, or any pet, I don’t have a garden, I am not as rich to set out on a shopping spree and those dishes? Never! So all left for me to do was the shower routine, which I was indeed excited about. But in the video what took up about 13 minutes, took me an hour! Or even longer. My parents are angry at me for wasting so much time and water, my brother’s project I was helping him with got delayed, I missed one of my favorite TV shows, and I had the exact same result I get from my regular showers. Don’t even get me started on the amount of hard work I had to put in for the ‘shower routine’. All this for what? Nothing very distinct.

What I mean by this story is, what I thought would make me feel ‘relaxed’ actually ended up with me working to no avail. It didn’t bring me joy; instead, I considered my whole hour wasted. Still, I wasn’t ready to give up on mastering me-time. So, I watched a few other videos but all of them consisted of things that either I didn’t own or couldn’t own, or these extensive routines. I wasn’t gonna fall for that again, so finally, I gave up. I am not the type of person to leave something that I started unfinished, so as soon as I gave up I didn’t feel very happy. Do you know what I did then? I picked up my Kindle and started a book that I had downloaded a while ago and kept reading. I read about 50 pages when my eyes started hurting a little bit.

So I got up and made myself some cold coffee. After that, I cleaned the dishes, washed and moped my balcony, cleaned the house, put laundry in the washer, then watered my plants and took a quick shower. After all that I made my family some chai (tea) and we all sat down to watch a movie together. Pretty basic, right? Nothing out of ordinary.

But I will you what it did. It made me forget about my phone, or laptop, or iPad, or anything which I would normally spend my time on. I felt productive because I cleaned and useful because I cooked for my family. It made me feel happy because I was with my family. It did tire me, yes, but I didn’t complain about it like I did when the extensive shower routine made me tired. This was a ‘satisfying exhaustion’. Not using this oxymoron for nothing. It actually was that way.

That was when I finally realized what me-time is. It is something that no YouTube video, no celebrity, no book or movie could teach you how, because your me-time can only be determined by you. Since me-time isn’t about doing things a certain way to feel relaxed. It is doing whatever comes naturally. It is when you don’t think about anything else rather than what you are doing at the moment and how it makes you feel. You do what you do because it takes your mind off things that worry you.

You are free to eat, sleep, drink, dance, laugh, cry, run, jump, cook, clean, read, anything, as long as you are being organic.

Wanna cook that dish? Cook it and eat it. Don’t wanna cook? Order in. Wanna learn that step? Learn and record yourself. House too dirty? Wanna clean? Clean. Want to re-decorate? Go for it. Wanted to write an article since long? Grab a pen. Haven’t cuddled with your pet in a while? Cuddle up! You don’t feel like doing a thing but sleep? By all means doze off! No one is stopping you. You decide. Do whatever comes to your mind (and is legal and is not off limits). Your me-time doesn’t have to be an hour long session, or a whole day, but it has to be you and your well-being. It can be a 5 minute session, or of 30 minutes, or even a couple of days, as long as it makes you feel like yourself and keeps you in sync with your mind and body.

Since today is 1^st of January, make this your resolution to reflect and do whatever is right for you. Rest of it will fall in place, eventually.

On this note, I end this little blog. Thanks for this read, hope it was worth your while. Happy New Year, folks! Stay safe, stay happy and healthy.

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